A quick word on face.

I'm sure you have all heard people talk about 'face' and the saving thereof, when others discuss Asian cultures. After 8 months in Beijing I have encountered the concept of face and had to deal with its bizarre ramifications a few times. But yesterday, Skye and I were presented with the perfect example of the bizarre mind-set that Beijing "Face" creates, and i believe the perfect way to explain it to people from outside a 'face' culture.

Yesterday Skye and I went to a Chinese cooking class (it was fantastic by the way! thank you Fairweathers and Hobbs'). During the seasoning and knife work section of the class, we were rudely interrupted by what sounded like a massive tree smashing against the roof of the beautifully old Hutong house and kitchen in which we were working. The whole building shook with the force of the blow.

Our teacher, shocked by the noise and a little concerned about the well-being of her home/workplace went to investigate. Now, neither of us speaks Chinese, nor did the two other blokes taking the class, but what we heard went something like this:

Teacher: "excuse me kind sir, I have several people next door working, and I would appreciate that you were a little more careful when pruning your trees"

Neighbour: SCREAMING "shut up, I didn't mean to do it, how dare you come here and tell me off for something i didn't mean to do, get the hell out of here, you idiot"

Teacher: "thank you, please just be more careful"

Neighbour: SCREAMING: "DIE YOU IDIOT DIE!!!!!!!"

(please note, this is a dialog was based on the tone of the conversation, the decibel level, and the look of shock on the teacher's face when she returned, NOT on my understanding of Chinese language)

Naturally, when the teacher returned, we all had a giggle at the expense of the retard neighbour and how quite clearly he is a mental patient. And, with that, we continued on learning about the wonders of Soy Sauce.

However, the crazy neighbour didn't stop, he was still yelling, even though there appeared to be no one out there with him. Then, "BANG!"

the front door gets kicked in, and its the neighbour, completely unhinged and threatening to kill everyone and smash the place up, except, what he probably didn't realise is that the tiny little teacher wasn't alone in her little kitchen, and so just as he prepared to burst through the door and "sort the situation out", he was confronted by 4 foreigners, 3 of them men, and all of them standing in shock holding massive meat cleavers!!!

Luckily, he made the wise decision to retreat, and just yell from outside. Our teacher, an old hand at dealing with Beijingers, simply slammed the door in his face and bolted it shut.

This commotion and carry-on was the result, not of the tree falling on the house, but rather because the neighbour, needing to protect his Face and manhood, could not admit he made a mistake. So, rather than simply saying to the teacher, "yeah sorry, I dropped the ball with that one, won't happen again", he takes the offensive and tries to demonstrate to everyone who will listen that she is mental, and crazy and attacking him for no reason.

I mean after all, what sort of weirdo would come and investigate a massive tree smashing against their roof? why wouldn't they just accept that the person cutting down the tree didn't mean it, and its all OK... why cause a fuss?

Face makes some people mental, beyond all belief.

It seems that very few people here have figured out that in saving your own face, you end up making a complete tit out of yourself. It's like the person who doesn't like to be the centre of attention and hates the spotlight, so instead of making the speech, bursts into tears in the middle of the room and then storms out all snot and wailing. That is, they end up getting exactly what they didn't want.

This idiot was no different. He made a complete and monumental tit of himself and in my opinion lost the respect of everyone that lives within that hutong, and the respect of all of you, because his behaviour is now on my blog. What a complete knob! All this rubbish because he has no idea how to cut down a tree!

The concept of face is yet another example of the contradictions of Beijing. That said, it made for a bit of excitement, and another entry to the blog, and for that I am grateful. And, more importantly opened my eyes to another interesting aspect of the human condition, something I am becoming more and more interested in.