Update

Well, it feels like so much has happened since my last email, and at the same time as if nothing has! I have been working, a lot. 6 days a week to be exact. Although it’s hard to think of it as work, firstly because I haven’t been paid yet, and secondly because it’s so much fun. The kids are just great. I am now teaching the full range of ages, from 3 to 15. I have 4 classes of my own, and I am also teaching 2 ‘summer camp’ classes and two VIP’s (that’s right 1 on 1’s). It sounds like a lot, but I only teach the VIPs and my own classes once a week. I teach the summer camp 3 times a week, but that’s only for 1 more week. After summer, I’ll have it pretty easy. I’ll only be actually teaching 3.5 days a week, the rest will be either off or ‘planning days’ which is teacher code for day off. The only bummer is that my 3.5 days are Thursday, Friday Saturday and Sunday. But you have to take the good with the bad.

To give you a basic idea of what it’s like teaching English over here, i’ll give you a quick summary of my lesson plan for my ‘small stars’ (kids 3-5 years old). The class runs for 1.5 hours, I spend about 45 minutes of that playing Head shoulders knees and toes, then ring a ring a rosie, then I like to do about 10 minutes of Star Jumps (all the time introducing new concepts in English, for example, stand up, fall down, sit down, run over there, come here, numbers letters etc). Usually by then, the kids are starting to tire, and I am close to vomiting from the exercise. So its song time, we sing some horrible song, like, “1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10, Hello again!” there is close to no tune and the music is just irritating but the kiddies love it. Then I hit them with the hard work. That’s right my friends I don’t care if they are 3, my class isn’t all fun and games... actually that’s not true, I normally spend the rest of the time, playing games with picture cards, hide and seek, twister etc. By the end of the 1.5 hours, the kids have been exposed to English, and can understand a little more, maybe even say a few new words, and I am completely stuffed, but happy!

oh, I forgot the puppets. Yes, yes, stop laughing, I too have trouble picturing we sitting crossed legged in front of 6 kids, having a conversation with a puppet. But i'll have you know that Mr Tiger is a lovely bloke, and surprising has an Australian accent. The kiddies go bloody mental for it. They know Mr Tiger is just me with a sock on my hand, but they don't care!!! Ahhh so much fun, and they pay me for this! (Hopefully anyway, refer opening paragraph!) So, what else is happening... Ahh, I bought a push bike today! That’s right my friends, I am now one of the masses. It’s great, I spared no expense and bought the best brand new bike, AUD50 can buy! It’s beautiful, it looks identical to the far more expensive foreign brand ‘Giant’, except it’s made from Chinese parts! I bloody love it; I’ve been out all day today just cruising about. When I get a chance i’ll take some pictures and send them through.

I have also confirmed that my bargaining skills are rubbish. I’m like the guy in monty python’s ‘Life of Brian’. This is how the exchange went (oh, he didn’t speak English, but he had a translation program on his computer, so imagine the below exchange, but with him typing, pulling a face then stepping back so I can type! It was like a Helen Keller convention!):

“It’s a great bike, good quality and good price, 350 yuan” he typed (read said)
“Ok, sounds good I’ll take it” I said and typed
“Yes, I know it sounds expensive but the price of Steel has gone up” he said
“that’s nice, I’ll take it.” Says I
“Ok, ok, i’ll throw in a free basket.” He says
“ cool, a free basket, I’ll take it” i say
“alright, you win, I’ll throw in a free lock and basket, for 350”
“ok, i’ll take it”
“sold!”

It was unbelievable, at one point I thought HE was going to ‘walk away’, only for me to chase after him and convince him I want to pay full price. Yes, yes, I know what you’re thinking, a basket! What a big poof. But the reality is a bicycle without a basket is like a bum without a hole; sure it looks great, but it’s not very practical!

I mean seriously, you can’t expect me to hang my fruit and vegies on the handlebars for the 5 minute ride home!